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Thursday, March 28, 2013

Rumahku syurgaku

Dua hari lepas, we went to see our late parents' house in Jitra. It took me years to have the courage to go there and have a look around it. Bukan apa. Terlalu banyak memori dekat situ. Ada manis, ada pahit. We left the house since Kak Bah wanted to have her own family. At that time dia dah ada anak satu. We respect her decision and tok was the one who was willing to take care 4 of us with one condition. She wanted us to move to Alor Setar, to her house. She refused to move in to our house. Faham faham sajalah, bila dah tua ni, dia sedap nak duduk rumah sendiri lagi. Memandangkan at that time we were still young, kitorang ikut sajalah permintaan tok. We have no option. Berat hati nak meninggalkan rumah tu since duduk tak sampai 5 tahun pun. Rumah masih baru. It took us some time to adjust to new environment. Yang paling effect sekali Ika la pasal that time dia baru nak masuk darjah 2. She had to move into new school and make new friends, and she had to leave her Kak Bah who had been taking care of her since she was born.I could still remember the first week of our stay in tok's house, Ika cried every night when she went to sleep. Teringat kat Kak Bah. Yep. Kak Bah is so close to our heart. She's the only person who knows us in and out.She knows our favourites. She knows how to pamper us. She's the only place for us to feel loved right after Mama and Abah died. Besar sungguh jasa dia pada kami 4 beradik. Tok is good as well in taking care of us, but we feel much loved when we were in Kak Bah's hand. Bond tu dah ada since we were kids.

The first family who rented the house after we left was somehow not really good in keeping the house clean and in perfect condition as it always been when we were still there. Bagi sewa pun murah sangat. Only RM350 for bungalow. Time tu fikir nak bagi ada orang duduk juga rumah tu.Sayang nak biarkan rumah tu kosong. At the end, tok asked them to move out sebab dorang 'pelingkup' rumah tu. It's like they're taking advantage of the low rental price. Sedih bila dapat tahu the house was not the same as before. When they left, the house had been abandoned for quite a long time. Time ni rumah lagi jadi teruk. Since our house was build on tanah persendirian, belakang dan tepi rumah adalah hutan pokok getah. Some said situ jadi sarang tempat 'taik pit' (drug addict) duk buat kerja depa. So, we heard other heartbreaking news that these people mencuri grill besi tingkap, longkang dan etc. Habis semua depa rongkah pergi jual kat kedai besi. Just so you know, this time I did not have any courage at all to go and see the house. I was afraid that I would break into tears, cried and hiccuped like a baby. Because I knew that mama and abah would be upset too. They build their dream house with all they have and expected us to look after it and here we are. Letting those crazy bad people to crash their hopes. Sakit hati Tuhan saja yang tahu. I could not do anything. I was too young back then to do what I was supposed to do. Mujur ada Pak Lang yang tolong uruskan hal rumah tu.

Alhamdulillah, sekarang yang menyewa dekat situ adalah orang dari Maahad Tahfiz. Their campus is just 50 metres from our house.They renovated the house and make it their hostel. Tempat mengaji pun kat situ, tempat masak pun kat situ. At least the house is not abandoned anymore. Dapat jugak pahala bagi dorang duduk kat situ. When I went there, dorang tengah mengaji. Segan pulak nak ambush rumah tu sesuka hati. Dua tiga kali jugak la tanya kat Ika nak masuk ke tak rumah ni sebab semuanya lelaki. Berjubah, bercelak, berserban. Jadi malu alah kita ni nak approach dorang. I was wearing blouse and jeans. Kalau sekali tengok tu, tak ada revealing apa pun tapi diri sendiri rasa macam 'bogel' sangat depan dorang.Huhuhu. I gave salam and approach this one man. Muka macam Ustaz Don! I introduced myself and mula la buat spotcheck dalam rumah tu. Ya Allah. Banyak sangat kenangan sebaik saja kaki ni melangkah masuk. Every sudut ada memori tersendiri. Tabahkan hati pusing satu rumah. Tak boleh nangis. Kena kuat. Lalu bilik mama, rasa macam dia duk ada lagi kat situ. Huhuhu. Nothing much changed except dorang sapu cat baru dan buat extension kitchen kat belakang rumah. Nampak la segala periuk belanga sebesar alam kat situ. Nak masuk dalam bilik,  segan pasal penuh dengan baju dan personal belonging anak teruna. The condition of the house, a bit messy. Mungkin dorang pun still in a process of moving things into the house. Rasa macam nak amik penyapu tolong sapu kat dapur tu. Berselerak.Huhuhu.

I haven't meet their ketua yet. Datang pun tak bagitau kat dorang. So next time hopefully boleh jumpa dia. Nak bagi amanah sikit. Ecewah. Tak sangka dah sampai masa untuk pegang tanggungjawab sebesar ni. Nak menjaga amanah tu bukan senang. Kadang kadang tergelincir juga di tengah jalan. Insya-Allah, we'll take care of the house like we take care of ourselves.

13 comments:

oshinz said...

okay.. menitik jugak air mata baca entri ni. tabah zack.. =)

Anonymous said...

Zack, sedih la baca entri ni. awk sangat kuat n tabah.

Anonymous said...

I went to ur parents' house once or twice gitu lah .. At that time ur arwah mom was not feeling fell .. so we went to visit her .. and the second time .. when she passed away. It's really a big and nice house .. n Yesss ... kak bah really like a mother to u n ur siblings. Ur younger sis really attached to her cos since she was a baby .. Kak Bah was the one who cared for her since ur mom was sick. I hope u and siblings keep on visiting her even tho she already has her own family. I did hear that ur parents' house has been abandoned .. sayang .. cos it's really a nice bungalow. Good to hear that u had visited the house recently ... hope that u could stay there with ur own family and ur siblings ..

aReLaN said...

baru tau zack anak yatim piatu.sori la ye. memang banyak kenangan rumah tu kan. selalu la doakan ur late parents.

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Irfa said...

rasa mcm sesuatu tersekat dimkerongkong masa baca entri ni
alfatihah utk kedua ibubapa Z@ck
semoga Allah tptkan mereka di kalangan org2 yg beriman dan mereka pasti gembira dgn anak2 yg soleh

eDdY said...

touching bile baca post ni..anyway z@ck u are so strong :)

Fatin Aliyya said...

Dear Kak Firah,

fatin mula kenal akak msa kt mrsm dlu.akak periang, aktif n sngt baik.n approachable. n fatin x pernah tahu sejrh hidup akak smplah i read ur blog. from that br fatin tahu.it must be hard on u kak firah. semoga akak terus kuat n kuat.

fatin doakan yg terbaik utk akak.
take care n all the best cikgu!:D

 
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